“Botheration,” said Pooh. “Botheration!”
But imagine my own consternation,
When they caught me off guard
And picked my back yard
For their annual bear convocation.
From the mountains and meadows and slews,
From menageries, stories, and zoos,
They descended en-masse,
Spread out on my grass,
And opened their beers and their booze.
The Paddington bears wore their bowlers.
The black bears and brown bears and polars
Exchanged big bear hugs,
Unrolled big bear rugs,
And pushed baby bears round in their strollers.
Santa bear, bearing gifts on his back,
Unloaded bear treats from a sack,
And Jack Nicklaus was there,
The old Golden Bear,
With his bear-Cam, an old Kodiak.
The cinnamon bears baked eclairs.
The grizzlies minced meat and split hares.
A koala bear, and a
Rich Chinese panda,
Growled about bear-market shares.
There were teddy and honey bears too,
And Christopher Robin and Pooh
Wrote post cards with kisses
And cheery good wishes
To Piglet and Eeyore and Roo.
President Medvedev was there
Arriving from Moscow by air.
In a tall bearskin hat,
He told the bearcat
That“Medved” was Russian for “bear.”
The Chicago Bears sent regrets.
They were losing a game to the Jets.
A ranger named Smokey
And a cartoon named Yogi
Donned tutus and turned pirouettes.
Goldilocks had three bears, and she brought ‘em;
The baby ran off, but she caught him.
The Alaskan brown bear
Would have been there,
But Sarah Palin flew over and shot him.
If bears come to your house, beware it
Wrecks the lawn and you’ll have to repair it.
Yes, bears will be bears,
So make the repairs,
Be gracious, be kind, and just bear it.
For once, at a very young age,
You saw a poor bear in a cage.
The filth and the flies
Brought tears to your eyes,
And you never got over the rage.
A bear lives a few years at most,
And a make-believe bear’s just a ghost,
But they all meet again
Over green yards within
The dreams of a welcoming host.
Creations, real or chimerical,
Grizzly, cute, or satirical,
All play a part
On lawns of the heart.
All creatures that are... are a miracle.