In His Eighties!

D’ya hear about Slade? He’s
In his eighties.
No way!   Wait, he’s
In his eighties?
Damn straight he’s
In his eighties!
Born in ’38, he’s
In his eighties.
Do we congratulate he’s
In his eighties,
Or commiserate he’s
In his eighties?
Maybe he’ll hate he’s
In his eighties.
We’ll visit!     No wait, he’s
In his eighties.
Yeah, it’s too late. He’s
In his eighties.
Open the Pearly Gate... he’s
In his eighties.
It makes me irate he
Lived to be eighty!
To hell with him then.
He’ll soon be in Hades.
He’s in his eighties.

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
AYE, MATEY!